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Great Blonde Jokes

  • Posted on September 18, 2009 at 12:52 pm

I saw these jokes posted on a Yahoo group recently and they really made me laugh, so I thought I would share. To all of my blonde gals out there – you know I love you! 😀

Blondes Are The Best!!!

A blonde and her husband are lying in bed listening to the next door neighbor’s dog.

It has been in the backyard barking for hours and hours.

The blonde jumps up out of bed and says, “I’ve had enough of this”.

She goes downstairs.

The blonde finally comes back up to bed and her husband says “The dog is still barking, what have you been doing?”

The blonde says, “I put the dog in our backyard, let’s see how THEY like it!


Two Blondes With Hammers…

Lynn and Judy were doing some carpenter work on a Habitat for Humanity house.

Lynn was nailing down house siding, would reach into her nail pouch, pull out a nail and either toss it over her shoulder or nail it in.

Judy, figuring this was worth looking into, asked, ‘Why are you throwing those nails away?’

Lynn explained, ‘When I pull a nail out of my pouch, about half of them have the head on the wrong end and I throw them away.’

Judy got completely upset and yelled, ‘You moron! Those nails aren’t defective! They’re for the other side of the house!’


Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in a drive-in movie?

They had gone to see ‘Closed for the Winter.’


A blonde was driving home after a game and got caught in a really bad hailstorm.

Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to a repair shop.

The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun.

He told her to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out.

So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her tailpipe.

Nothing happened.

So she blew a little harder, and still nothing happened.

Her blonde roommate saw her and asked, ‘What are you doing?’

The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out.

The roommate rolled her eyes and said, ‘Uh, like hello!

You need to roll up the windows first.’


A blonde was shopping at Target and came across a shiny silver Thermos.

She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and took it to the clerk to ask what it was.

The clerk said, ‘Why, that’s a thermos….. It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold.’

‘Wow,’ said the blonde, ‘that’s amazing….I’m going to buy it!’

So she bought the thermos and took it to work the next day.

Her boss saw it on her desk. ‘What’s that,’ he asked?

‘Why, that’s a thermos….. It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold,’ she replied…

Her boss inquired, ‘What do you have in it?’

The blond replied….. …’Two popsicles and some coffee.’



A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out.

Her boss asked sympathetically, ‘What’s the matter?’

The blonde replies, ‘Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away.’

The boss, feeling sorry for her, says, ‘Why don’t you go home for the day? Take the day off to relax and rest.’

‘Thanks, but I’d be better off here. I need to keep my mind off it and I have the best chance of doing that here.’

The boss agrees and allows the blonde to work as usual.

A couple of hours pass and the boss decides to check on the blonde.

He looks out from his office and sees the blonde crying hysterically.

‘What’s so bad now? Are you gonna be okay?’ he asks.

‘No!’ exclaims the blonde. ‘I just received a horrible call from my sister. Her mother died, too!’

Google Reader Users – Am I Spammy Now?

  • Posted on September 13, 2009 at 12:20 am

I’ve been researching and Terry and I have been deleting things all over the place in my WordPress database, install directory and even in my Gallery directory. Hopefully, they weren’t all hacks. And hopefully my blog still works.

For those of you who detected the problem for me, can you please confirm that it’s now fixed and I haven’t screwed up anything in the process? 😀

Thanks to all of you who reported the problem! I hate spammers and hackers…

And Another Test

  • Posted on September 13, 2009 at 12:02 am

Still deleting potentially hacked files…

Another Test

  • Posted on September 12, 2009 at 11:48 pm

Testing feed to Google Reader again.

Testing Spammy Posts in Google Reader

  • Posted on September 12, 2009 at 11:38 pm

A couple of you reported my posts looking all spammy in Google Reader, so I did some research and am trying to remove all of the possible hacks that might have happened to my blog. So, let’s see if I found everything or not…

Keeping My Mind Occupied With Stitching

  • Posted on September 12, 2009 at 10:00 am

I have to do something to keep myself occupied right now so that my thoughts don’t wander into dark territory. Both of my wrists and both elbows are causing me pain right now due to all of the excessive time spent on the laptop during the months leading up to the completion of that huge project at work, so I can’t exactly come home and fiddle on the laptop right now without injuring myself further. So, what else can a gal do to keep busy? Why, stitch, of course! Believe it or not, it doesn’t aggravate my wrists very much and when I get some twinges, I just strap on a pair of splints and I can keep going without making things worse. I don’t claim to understand the workings of my body…

Anyway, as a result, I have more stitching to share already. I have two pieces I’ve stitched, but cannot reveal yet because they are entries into Anna’s stitching challenge, which ends on the 16th.

The first photo I can actually post is a finish-finish of Periphaeria Designs’ Kokopelli into a biscornu. I was going through my pile of finished work with my mom when they were down here the other weekend and I realized that both sides of this biscornu were stitched; all I had to do was put it together:

Next is Just Nan’s Frost on the Pumpkin. It was released first as a limited edition Whimzi that I bought at the last CATS festival in Hershey a couple of years ago. She has since released it to the general public, but I can’t find a link to it on her site. I stitched this one up in the wee hours of one morning recently when I had a bout of insomnia. The white stitches on the snowflakes look a bit wonky because I found that, for some odd reason, I didn’t have any Kreinik 032 blending filament to go over the top of the stitches, so I had to use DMC’s equivalent metallic floss. It didn’t exactly work, but it will just have to be good enough:

Then we have my rendition of the Fall Biscornu, which is the current freebie contest running on The Victoria Sampler Yahoo! group. I’m not actually entering it into the contest because the point is for Thea to have models that she can use on her website to promote the design, along with a list of the materials used for each model. Well, I stitched portions of my biscornu with unlabeled overdyed silks from a grab bag and a limited edition overdyed silk that is no longer available. Oh well, looking at the current entries, there was no way I was going to win anyway! 🙂 Thea offered 4 different possible corner designs; I chose to use the pumpkins on one side and the leaves on the other. In hindsight, the border kind-of clashes with the rest of the design. Too bad!

So, here is one side stitched up with the pumpkins design:

And the other stitched up with the leaves design:

And here is the finished product:

And finally, there is my latest finish. I completed the stitching and beading last night, along with sewing the pocket together. I just strung the beads for the chain this morning. This is from a Mill Hill Treasured Stitching Band Kit for a scissor pocket, named Mauve Heart Sampler. The white and sea glass colored beads didn’t really show up in the scan unfortunately. You can see them a little better in the larger sized scan, if you are interested:

That’s all from me for now. Off to work on a WIP that hasn’t been touched in at least 2 years. I’d like to actually finish it and frame it in time for it to become the Christmas present that it was intended to be. 😉

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