This is my second attempt at this post because I accidentally hit F5 and nuked the first one. *sigh*<\/p>\n
It’s been a long week so far. Terry is sick, just as I suspected he would be after this past weekend. He has my cold and even had a 24-hour stomach bug the other day that had him running to the bathroom every couple of hours. I’ve been working from home this week, trying to play nursemaid and make sure he gets enough rest. He’s had to log into work and fix things every day so far, relating to the system implementation. There is no rest for the weary, I guess. Poor guy!<\/p>\n
So, I drove myself into work this morning and am actually in my office. It feels a bit odd to be sitting here for the first time since Saturday. And I haven’t driven my car in a couple of weeks, so I was anxious about it. Driving makes me nervous, in general, because I have no way to predict what kind of stupidity may come from other drivers on the road with me! I was nearly in an accident this morning, as I was coming through a train tunnel. I was almost clear of the tunnel when a guy in a good-sized truck coming the other direction started crossing way over the center line. By about a foot or so. So… I could have swerved right to get out of his way, ensuring that I scratch the back of the car against the concrete corner of the tunnel. Or I could have braked, but that would have required him to become aware of his error and correct it or brake, which I couldn’t count on. Or I could have kept on moving, hoping that I got safely out of the way before he scraped against the back of my car. So I did. And I escaped unharmed.<\/p>\n
Surprisingly, I was calm about the whole thing. Mostly, I think, due to the fact that I was just coming from my psychologist visit and I was feeling a little more relaxed than normal. I absolutely LOATHE that tunnel, though. I always have. It’s poorly engineered and people are afraid of the sides, so they naturally tend towards the middle of what is already a too-narrow opening. It’s a very short tunnel under the railroad tracks, but it was so badly planned that it takes a sudden dip to get into it (which becomes amazingly icy in the winter due to bad drainage) and it makes a 60 degree turn that is blind in both directions. The road also gets a surprising amount of traffic from the locals, so they really need to fix it some day. Unfortunately, the way things seem to work around here, someone would have to be killed or badly injured for anything to change. And no one wants that, so oh well!<\/p>\n
My psychologist visit went pretty well today. Very emotional again. He even commented that he always seems to make me cry. To which I responded that I don’t often get that kind of emotional release, so he just happens to offer an opportunity to vent. \ud83d\ude42 He’s referring me to another psychologist for longer-term care. I somewhat expected this, especially after today. I just have too many issues relating to my childhood, my parents’ divorce and my mom’s illness to work through in the 5 sessions allotted by my workplace. So, I called the insurance company and started the case management process to ensure that my future visits will be covered and then I called and left a message with one of the three people that he recommended. It’s another male, so I’m a little nervous about whether or not I will like him. I’m not sure what happens in the process of finding a psychologist. What if I don’t click with him? Should I have gone for the female on the list? Would I feel more comfortable with a female versus a male? So far, it hasn’t really mattered. It’s all about bedside manner, I suppose. Perhaps Carol can weigh in on this subject for me, if she catches this. Is okay to switch if you don’t think it’s working with one doctor? Is it expected to need to try several before you find the right fit?<\/p>\n
BTW, does anyone know what the difference is between a PhD and an LCSW (social worker) when it comes to therapy? Is one better than another? Has anyone seen both? I’m just curious as he gave me the names of two male PhDs and one female LCSW.<\/p>\n
He also gave me some suggestions as to what to try in order to shut my brain off for a little while everyday. I have yoga tapes (though I don’t have a VCR hooked up at the moment) and a mat, but just don’t make time for it. I even have a game called The Journey to Wild Divine<\/a> that I know will do the trick. I have both parts that are out so far and haven’t even installed part 2, which I’ve had since October. Shame on me! He also recommended some books, for which I have already placed an order with Amazon. I am definitely on the road to self-discovery. And what an odyssey it promises to be!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" This is my second attempt at this post because I accidentally hit F5 and nuked the first one. *sigh* It’s been a long week so far. Terry is sick, just as I suspected he would be after this past weekend. … Continue reading