{"id":149,"date":"2005-08-11T13:26:35","date_gmt":"2005-08-11T17:26:35","guid":{"rendered":"\/?p=149"},"modified":"2005-08-10T10:28:00","modified_gmt":"2005-08-10T14:28:00","slug":"why-is-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/?p=149","title":{"rendered":"Why Is It &#8230;. ?"},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote><p>\nWhy do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?<\/p>\n<p>Why do banks charge a fee on &#8220;insufficient funds&#8221; when they know there is not enough?<\/p>\n<p>Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?<\/p>\n<p>Why doesn&#8217;t glue stick to the bottle?<\/p>\n<p>Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?<\/p>\n<p>Why doesn&#8217;t Tarzan have a beard?<\/p>\n<p>Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?<\/p>\n<p>Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?<\/p>\n<p>Whose idea was it to put an &#8220;S&#8221; in the word &#8220;lisp&#8221;?<\/p>\n<p>If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?<\/p>\n<p>Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use, the bubbles are always white?<\/p>\n<p>Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?<\/p>\n<p>Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?<\/p>\n<p>Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?<\/p>\n<p>Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end you first try?<\/p>\n<p>How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?<\/p>\n<p>When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, &#8220;It&#8217;s all right?&#8221; Well, it isn&#8217;t all right so why don&#8217;t we say, &#8220;That hurt, you stupid idiot?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that&#8217;s falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?<\/p>\n<p>In winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?<\/p>\n<p>How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?<\/p>\n<p>If at first you don&#8217;t succeed, shouldn&#8217;t you try doing it like your wife told you to do it?<\/p>\n<p>And obviously if at first you don&#8217;t succeed, then don&#8217;t take up sky diving!<\/p>\n<p>And last but not least&#8230;&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends, and if they&#8217;re okay, do you understand that it&#8217;s you?\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak? Why do banks charge a fee on &#8220;insufficient funds&#8221; when they know there is not enough? Why does someone believe you when you &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/?p=149\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/149"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=149"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/149\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=149"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=149"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.jennamagee.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=149"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}